Falling in a pit of blackness. Fading out of perception. Putting on a mask that defies all of your morals. A mask that spreads its toxin to your heart. Black tendrils seeping in and contaminating all you hold dear…. Or do you have anything anymore to hold dear? Is it all gone? Were you already drowning in an abyss of tragedy? Put on the mask. Let the inky dark take over your bright light. No one is going to save you from yourself. Fool them all into thinking you're someone else. That way when you get hurt it doesn't hurt you. It doesn’t hurt at all. Not anymore. Nothing can get past the shell that encases your heart. What’s wrong? I’m fine you say? Fine? How can you be fine when you can’t feel anything anymore and you don’t even know who you are? You don’t even know where you belong. You break yourself on purpose. You cut deeper on purpose. You push everyone away because you’re afraid. But no one knows. The sun always seems to wash our fears away. The sun goes down you take off your mask. You see what you’ve become and wish that you could find who you once were. But you can never go back. You’ve already started on this path of self-destruction. You’re a ticking time bomb waiting for the final seconds. So don’t get involved emotionally, put on a front. Don’t let them see what you really are. No one will want you if they see the real you. The one under the mask. You break your heart on purpose and smile, a broken smile, while burning the pieces of your soul.
No one is going to save you from yourself…
Choking on the fumes of loneliness. Drowning in a sea of empty smiles and gestures. Using rainbows and glitter to cover the holes in your soul. Days are meaningless and mundane. You scream but no one hears you. You thrash but cannot escape the binding that holds you. You slowly give up and sink into the ink black. No one cares. No one hears. No one sees your sorrow and grief. All they see is your mask. They can’t see what you’ve Done and they’ll never know what you’ve become. A shell of who you once were. A mistake. A failure. Will you ever be Enough? Will you ever have someone who will love you for who you are? Not who they think you are. How can you be so alone in a sea of people? Red drops on white tile. Scars criss-cross your heart and arms. Tears and faded memories pull at the strings of your life. Cut just a little more. Cry one more time. Maybe it will make you feel better. Cover your arms with scars and your heart with darkness. Sharp tendrils piercing the essence of your soul. No one’s going to save you. No one is going to help you. Why do you even try?
Then suddenly two worlds collide. The stars align and burst into brilliant sparks of blues reds and yellows. Someone who sees behind the mask. Someone who can cut away the thorns that chained you to the past. Someone. Someone who knows what it’s like to struggle through pitch black. Someone who cares. Intertwined by grief and pain. You ease each other’s sorrows and together shine a light that cuts away the darkness. Two people covered with their own scars and memories. Two souls forming one. One without chains. One soul that is….free.